Weevils, not weebles.

Although I like to think of myself as laid back, I am not. I don't do well with bugs in my house of any kind. But especially relentless bugs. What is a relentless bug? To me, its ants, roaches (thankfully, I don't have them!), mosquitoes, flies. Let's face it, these pests are hard to get rid of. Last summer it was ants in the bathroom shower, marching on to battle in one single line. Marching up the shower door or the corner of the shower stall. Where did they think they were going!?

Recently, weevils in my pantry. Here's how it went down.

When I come home after a shopping expedition, I usually give Collins a dog biscuit. Why? Because he's been patrolling the house and keeping it safe. Also, his reaction is so cute. He gets so excited, he takes the dog biscuit very gently and carefully, then tears off running like something is after him. Cracks me up every time!

So a few weeks ago, while fishing out a dog biscuit for Collins, I noticed they looked weird, there were tiny holes in the dog biscuit. By this time Collins is losing his patience as I examine his dog biscuits. Upon further investigation, I saw tiny black rice-like bugs on the counter, that moved!!! Damn things had dropped from the bottom of the box! Oh SHIT! Sorry, Collins, these are no good! Dumped the box in the trash, while spraying Raid in the trash can. What the hell? I went back to the pantry and grabbed an opened box of pasta. Crap, saw the same thing in the bottom of the box. Could this have happened because I was now only buying whole wheat pasta? I think not. I don't remember this happening to the "white" pasta. I'm just thinking out loud.

I phoned the exterminator to find out what these tiny, black rice-like bugs were. The girl said weevils. "Weebles?" I said. You mean like "weebles wobble, but they don't fall down", weebles? I questioned in my sarcastic tone. There was a pause, then I heard hysterical laughter on the phone, "no W-e-e-v-i-l-s", and there's nothing we can spray to get rid of them. After she regained her composure, she told me to take everything out and wipe down my pantry. Put flour, rice, pasta, etc. in airtight containers. Most everything was already in airtight containers, except dog biscuits. And the pasta!

At this point, I flipped out because I was so grossed out! I am a clean person and my house is clean. It might be messy, but its clean, I tell you!
I ran to the computer and googled weevils, then googled weevil images. Trust me when I say DON'T DO THIS. It gave me the heebie jeebies and nightmares for a week. I have chills just writing this post. Reminds me of my mom, Gaston Studio, writing about those damn cockroaches and posting that horrifying photo. Not to mention the snake post. Moving on...

I emptied the entire contents of the pantry out into the kitchen. I examined every box of pasta, crackers and every food item in the pantry. I was shocked to find these disgusting creatures in several items, even a package of opened paper napkins and sitting on top of a can of beans. My kids definitely thought I had gone over to the dark side, I was a mad woman, looking for airtight containers to store every item that was going back in that pantry. Shaking boxes, throwing food in the garbage disposal, take that! I took pleasure listening to the disposal grinding up anything resembling a black rice-like creature. Armed with a flashlight and clorox clean-up, I wiped down the walls, the corners and the shelves in that blasted pantry. This took hours as I needed sufficient time and couldn't be rushed. Do you rush the CSI people? I think not, otherwise they would never find the culprit.

As I was freaking out, I tried looking on the bright side and the end product, an extremely clean and organized pantry, no thanks to the weevils. I mean, really, what purpose do these despicable creature have?